Kat Ramblings

Following up on the fun I had working the Center for Sex Positive Culture's booth at SEAF this year I've volunteered to for our booth at Pride this year. I have no idea what time I'll be working it(which I'm a bit cranky about) but I'm fairly sure it will be some time after 1pm. Extra bonus is that my girl will be pimpin the Center with me...that is when we aren't make-in out. And I'm pretty sure we won't be the only lascivious hotties hangin out there.

It should be an amazing Parade and post Parade festival this year as the gay community has really leapt forward in its fight for civil rights. Who'd have thought they we'd have come this far even as little as 8 years ago. That being said...we should be a lot farther. With recent bitch slaps from an administration we fought so hard for I think its safe to say that in the midst of our flamboyant celebrations this Sunday there will be an equally strong call to arms.

On that note, I think this clip pretty clearly outlines what it is the LGBTQ community is so pissed off about.

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
The Word - Stonewalling
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Mark Sanford

http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/232014/june-25-2009/the-word---stonewalling

I hope you make it out to enjoy the plethora of festivities going on this weekend in most cities, whether you self-identify as queer or not. And if you happen to find yourself at the Seattle Center after the parade come by the Center's booth and say hi. You'll find us on top of the Fisher Pavilion near the VIP lounge.

I just won tickets from the Stranger to the 2009 Air Sex Championships at El Corazon tonight. I won the tickets by being the first to email the free tickets team with my favorite sexual position in the subject line. Downward facing dog...girl top male bottom. I may have gone for more humor then honesty...but maybe not.

Not sure just yet who'll be my date for the evening...anyone else want to "come" along, even if you have to buy your own $12 ticket? Drop me an email if you're interested.

Should be a rowdy and ridiculous evening...




http://www.mikethrasherpresents.com/dbmonkey/event.cfm?cal=thrasher&id=19800

Few things I wanted to put out there but first I wanted to give all my playmates a heads up that I still have time available this weekend. Not a lot of time mind you but I could probably squeeze in a couple more play dates. This isn't normally what I would call blog worthy but since this very well might be my LAST FREE WEEKEND I thought you weekend warriors might want to take advantage.

Okay, I may have one or two more weekends this summer that aren't already commandered by big social and or travel but, sheesh, it sure doesn't feel like it. I don't particularly like posting my travel dates on the internet so if you'd like to know my availability you'll still need to call. And if you'd like your travel plans to include visiting me, a month or more notice is not out of line.

So onto other fun stuff. I've been compiling a list of fun links that I figured I'd take a few minutes to post before I throw on my sandals and head out into the sunshine.

First up, just grabbed this from the SLOG. I think its a pretty clever and comic idea. Yes its political and safe for work. Here's a blurb about this new series:

"DRILL BABY DRILL, THE SERIES: From contraception to homosexuality, Conservatives seem to think they know how folks should behave in the bedroom. Well, what do they say about sex? How do they, y'know, talk sexy? The answers may surprise you. They may also make you throw up in your mouth a little bit."




For additional controversial fun spend some time reading the postings over at Psychotic Letters From Men. THE PSYCHOTIC. THE PATHETIC. THE BIZARRE. A Forum To Show Men Who The Real Bitch Is. http://psychoticlettersfrommen.blogspot.com/.

I recognize that there is a certain Jerry Springer-esque appeal to reading tales of men gone mental. But the blog's writer has an amazingly quick and biting wit which is what raises the forum above a train wreck level. Beyond that, within each story of love gone sour and psychotic is a cautionary tale. I just finished reading the Gift of Fear while I was up at Hyak last week(I know, strange choice for a relaxing weekend) and all of Mr De Becker's pointers on how to spot someone truly dangerous are easily applied to the submittals on PLFM. Ladies, we know that most of the men that have come in and out of our lives are basically good guys. Reading this blog will only highlight that fact in a "you thought your break-up was bad" kinda way. But it sure as hell doesn't hurt to see a few more examples of why being crystal clear in our rejections is so important. And any of the reliable lender lads and ladies in my posse who would like to borrow my copy of the Gift of Fear drop me an email. It's a very worth while read.


Another great on-line offering is the new San Fran based site Carnal Nation:


http://sf.carnalnation.com/

From the daily sexual issue news, to the great feature articles on a wide range of topics from the work of sexual surrogates to how to bow out gracefully(or stay to play) when you find yourself in a Crying Game moment, to the weekly comic strip Modern Hooker this site has quickly become one of my favorite morning reads. A number of other blogs that I visit often touch on sexual politic stuff but I have yet to find one with such extensive coverage as well as an impressive list of contributors.

Here's what they have to say about their site in case you still need convincing:

"CARNALNATION was developed out of a compelling need to counteract those oppressive forces, whether internal or external, that stifle sexual growth, awareness, and fulfillment. We believe that sex is a vital human need and that sexuality is an important component of who we are as individuals, how we relate to each other, and who we want to become. In our view, fear and disdain of all things sexual have led to a society that too often vacillates between impulsive titillation and compulsive repression. Such extremes can only have a negative impact on our physical, psychological, and social well being. Therefore, we strive to inform and entertain without being pornographic or offensive. We make this commitment at all levels of sexuality: the personal, the political, and the perverted."

Well, then. Doesn't that sound pretty awesome.



Speaking of awesome, the HBO series Tru Blood totally kicks ass!!! I'd read and enjoyed the series this show is based on but damn, I don't know if there's a single thing I'd change...actually I take that back, the fangs are a bit weird/silly. They're placed more forward then usual...and make a ridiculous clicking noise every time they drop into place. Anyhoo, its wonderful southern style trashy n' tasty goodness. So if you're in the market some highly addictive brain candy, the first season is out on DVD right now.

Okay one more thing...my lovely girl sent this to me last night(when she should have been packing for the flight she's on right now). That's her on the left and me on the right. Not sure what application she used to create the comic book affect from these two photos. But I think I've supplied ya'll with enough internet time sucks as it is. Better yet...turn off your computer, cut out of work early and get outside!

Lily Allen's new song Guess Who Batman(aka Fuck You Very Much) performed by a bunch of utterly adorable young gay youtube kids, with a cameo from one of their mothers. No NSFW images but there is a good bit of swearing as the name implies.



It's a nice bit of uplift after a few of the civil liberty bomb drops of the past week or so, from unnecessarily heavy-handed recent raids on a number of much beloved local massage parlors to the California Supreme's unsurprising, though very disappointing, Prop 8 decision. Some how recent victories in the areas of civil rights make the lost battles all that much more depressing. Damn my civic optomisim...I keep thinking we're evolving as a society and then someone comes along and takes a big poo in my front yard.

In other uplifting news the much anticipated advent of warm weather has had its usual affect on my social calendar. Lots of fun adventures planned that involve gettin the hell outta Dodge for a few days. Last weekend I slipped away to Hyak with a few pals to see the last of the snow and spend much goofy time around the fireplace. On the way back down the mountain I spent a very spiritually grounding afternoon frolicking beside a river. I've already made plans to drag my girl up there with me next time so she can enjoy the beauty of nature too...and I can enjoy her immensely beautiful nakid bod if I can talk her into posing for a bit of a photo shoot.

Other outward bound upcoming activities include a trip up to the Gulf Islands with a bunch of pals, plenty of yet un-named camping, as well as woodsy day, trips, all leading up to my first year attending Paradise Unbound, the CSPC week long outdoor event in the kinky wilds of Redmond/Fall City.

I love the fact that as down-home and mundane sounding as some of my travel plans may seem on the surface, my group of companions pretty much guarantees that at some point(and possibly many) someone is going to get spanked and/or tied up. Who could have foreseen that my good little Girl Scout fire building skills would one day illuminate such acts of perversion.

As much as my country pisses me off sometimes, all I can say is Goddess Bless America.

So I'm working on a post all about my SEAF adventures. Hey, its comin, we're talking about three whole nights of kinky goodness after all.

In the mean time, and because it is somewhat time sensitive, I wanted to post about a new event that is happening this Thursday night.



This is the blurb they had about it on one of the kink networking sites:

date: Thursday, May 07, 2009
time: 10:00 PM to 02:00 AM
where: REBAR
address: www.rebarseattle.com
cost: $7
dress code: Fetish/Kink/something clever and fun. If nothing: you'll be dressed down to your underwear.

Description
Get your rocks off and your candy licked at the Rebar, first Thursdays starting May the 7th!

Invite your kinky, sexy, fun friends! Come prepared to bust a move, smack some ass and have a blast with us! Free your mind and our asses will follow!

The event is being sponsored by Scott Paul Designs, and Leatherpost.com and is likely to be a hard-to-find-in-Seattle blend of straight, gay and everything in-between kinksters. The crowd is sure to be, um, diverse and entertaining.

I chatted with a couple of the organizers at SEAF last weekend and have a really good feeling about this event. Especially since they both feel the same level of annoyance that I do about how hard it is to get folks to fucking dress-up in this damn town. I'm pretty sure they are serious about stripping you down to your panties if you show up without having made an effort to dress appropriately.

I did ask(even though I pretty much knew the answer) if there will be actual play permitted on the premises and despite the "smack some ass" comment this will NOT be a play party. Seattle, alas, has some seriously puritanical ideas about what consenting adults can be trusted to do to each other in a public space, especially when there is alcohol involved. So look at this as yet another great opportunity to meet folks that you may get to play with in the legal privacy of your own home.

Personally I'm just looking forward to seriously getting my flirt on, getting another night to play dress-up(no, SEAF was NOT enough), getting my dance groove on which is so much easier to do when I've had a drink or two, and, of course, getting to put my hands all over my girl, while she does all of the above, without having a bunch of photos taken of us(you'll have to wait for my SEAF post to get the nitty gritty on that comment).

Hope to see ya there.

Oops, and lastly GREAT BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY WISHES TO sirriamnis

"I'll be in my bunk"




http://bob-basset.livejournal.com/62768.html

Though the artist did an amazing job making the tentacles look like they are organic and on the move...I'm fairly certain that they don't move, much less capable of the kind of activities I would like to engage in with them...

*sigh*

but a tentacle lovin perv can still dream...

Time for a Great Big Update for April just in time to count down that last few days of it. Yes I've been busy...doing lots of fun stuff blah blah blah...parties at the Spot...a drag show at Julia's...sex with my hot redheaded girlfriend...a tango lesson...lots of smacking folks around in pay for play scenarios as well as the afore mentioned hot redhead and another extra tasty lady...I even managed to work in a nice penis pony ride AND a 24hr trip to Portland, since the last time I checked in here.

So yeah, busy. Tough gig, isn't it?

But all that's not important. As much as you'd surely like to hear all the juicy details from the above adventures, something even MORE important, titillating, and timely is about to occur. Something so significant that it has pulled me from my non stop buffet of pussy and power play to update this damn blog. In just a few short days the sexiest event* in Seattle WILL BE HAPPENING!!!!!



That's right pals and pervs its time once again for the infamous Seattle Erotic Arts Fest!!!

This year is sure to be even bigger and better then the previous ones...which means you will only appear to be that much more lame if you can't drag your ass down to the Seattle Center Exhibition hall for at least one of the days or nights its running.

It should go without saying that the nights are considerably tastier as the eye candy walking around looking at all the eye candy on the walls makes things that much more sweet and savory. But if you don't like crowds, or are worried about yer mom running into you while yer lookin all teh porn, then slip in for a matinee at least.

Extra special bonus incentive(though you really shouldn't need one...seriously this thing rocks) is that I won't just be in attendance for you to see, possibly hang out with or stalk(depending on how well I know ya), I'll be volunteering and pretty easy to find both at the special VIP party Thursday evening and the big last night hurrah on Saturday.

Unless you just joined us, you've all heard me pimp out the Center for Sex Positive Culture and its numerous, wonderful events, workshops and parties MANY times. Even in person, I like to remind local folks that they do have a great and accessible community organization the likes of which no other city can claim. There's really no need for a kinky person to have to stumble around in the dark by themselves in this town...not when its so much more fun to do it with other kinky folks. So following along with that agenda, I'll be manning the Center's "exhibit" at SEAF and chatting up the event's attendees, answering questions, and hopefully once again putting a friendly face to an organization, and ideology, that many may still find threatening. Surely with some of the meant-to-disturb art offerings on display little bitty me and my vision of a sex positive world will be a welcome safe haven for any scared bunnies who accidentally show up.

Muah ha ha ha.

I've been informed that the CSPC exhibit will be toward the back to one side of the stage, between the scent memory exhibit and the commemorative(and fund-raising) photo booth. There's supposed to be a banner. I'll hopefully be on the busy side, and not really able to spend hours chatting with pals, but do come over and say hi whether you know me yet or not.

I will also be attending Friday evening, and that's my night to drunkenly schmooze and enjoy the art. Though I will be much harder to find given my height, the sheer number of people that are sure to be there, and the fact that I'll be on the move. So feel free to let me know in the comments if I should keep my eye out for you.

Check out the website, follow the links to buy your tickets on-line or to find an in-person location selling them(they may sell-out at the event and even if they don't the ticket line sucks), spend some time putting together something fabulous, scandalous, and/or sexy to wear, come early and stay late.

http://seattleerotic.org/

This is one event you don't want to have to wait to hear me blog about. Come experience this for yourself!

See ya there...



*okay, there may have been a few things I did this last month which still rival SEAF for the sexiest title...but SEAF is something that more then just me and my playmate get to enjoy.

This was just one of those silly name generators...but still kinda cool...

Your Supervillain Name is Stormy Bullet

Muhahahaha!

Kinda silly bog quiz...not sure I agree with it but it does involve a picture of a pretty kitty...

You Are a White Tiger

You have a strong individualistic streak. You are unique and outspoken. You have firm ideas of right and wrong. You will stand up for your unpopular beliefs with pride. You believe that learning the truth is important. Even if it's ugly, uncomfortable, or awkward. You give it to people straight, and you expect them to do the same. You can't stand ambiguity of any kind.

My good buddy TJ, knowing my fetish for long aquatic arms, usually as represented in Hentai(the sick and twisted branch of the Japanamation Porn industry) sent me a link to this fabulous blog last week.:



http://todayintentacles.blogspot.com

Though it does mostly have to with actual real world tentacled creatures, like octopi, squid, cuttle and jelly fish, and NOT so much with sex-crazed many "armed" demons, it's an awfully fun read and often has links to great tentacle inspired art work, jewelry and swag. Like this lovely outfit that will be my gift to the first spawn any of my breeder pals creates:



Speaking of sex-crazed demons, I'm seriously in lust with these illumination fixtures:


http://www.jonathanlevinegallery.com/?method=Artist.ArtistDetail&ArtistID=EED2F4E9-115B-5562-AA8B85B721777481&GalleryID=82C33C59-3048-28EB-92DB386C8C733405

I did end up buying the bottom necklace in this picture. A friend of mine has one too and I've been in serious envy of it since I first saw her wearing the damn thing. It was either buy my own...or break into her apartment and steal hers.



And for all my Steampunk pals, you'll want to check out these two links:

http://thetentacleparadox.com/blog/
The guy raises(and occasionally bottles) cuttlefish???!!!

http://www.paxtongate.com/
A great source for, well, cool dead stuff.

Shopping aside, it's a great blog to check out if you're even the littlest bit of an earth science geek. There's good stuff to know on there even if you've already heard that golden showers are the best treatment for a jellyfish sting.

For your completely pointless time suck enjoyment...I share with you the Hero Maker

http://www.cpbintegrated.com/theherofactory/

So despite my plans and many good reasons for going, I did not make it to last weeks HUMP. I was unexpectedly attacked by a 5'9" squirrel and ended up staying home for some private sexy chat and play.

But it does sound like I missed quite a party. The pre-play discussion this time around was orgy etiquette, which actually managed to inspire a full blown orgy later that night. I'm sure it was quite the sight to be seen. Though the curtain was back in place between the masturbation area and the rest of the play space this time around, so if it was viewed by solo players, it was through a soft fabric haze. But the party-for-one kids did get their very own private show at some point that night as a generous and exhibitionist couple bridged the gap and set their scene in the self-love section.

The debate on this issue has been fairly heated but I'm actually really proud of how, aside from some unnecessary derogatory terms for the self-love crew(which were addressed and people fixed their language), the conversation has been surprisingly flame free. It's always so nice when a discussion can be productive instead of just a bunch of whining and name calling. But as last week's HUMP seems to have attested, people can challenge themselves and change their minds.

My new plan is to attend HUMP next week which, while still a lot of fun, might prove to be more controversial in its set up. Copied from the Center's website:

"What's going on with the Solo space this week?

This week will feature the intense set-up, with the solo space and the cuddle/romp pile separated by the columns. Sheer curtains will hang between the spaces. The sheer curtains will be Open from 10:00-11:00, and clear signs and announcements will remind you.

Hump will feature public sex futons on the dance floor outside the solo space and not in view of the solo space tonight. And Hump will add some tables for social interactions to the end of the dance floor as well, out of view of solo space"

Since the event organizers are giving folks plenty of warning, hopefully there won't be as much fall-out this time around. I'll keep my legs crossed just in case.

As I mentioned in my last post, tonight I'l be attending the monthly masturbation party, And I touch Myself. Extra special bonus is that I will be accompanied by the afore mentioned giant attack squirrel, who is in truth, a lovely, willowy built, red-headed goddess. She sort of looks like me...if you'd put me on a rack and stretched me out for another foot, but we have the exact same hair, dark blue eyes and perfectly pale skin, though she scored more freckles. She's also notably younger then I am, so much so that its insanely tempting to fuck with people by saying she's my daughter...and then thoroughly making out with her in front of them.

Who knows, maybe I'll put my plan into action tonight at the party. Even without such porno-rific role-play we are sure to cause a stir. I have no intention of putting on a public sex show while there...but we do tend to have a hard time keeping our hands off each-other...maybe just a little bit of wrestlie tickle torture. Though I don't even think its bragging to say that we could both be sitting at a table doing our taxes while wearing ski suits and still provide plenty of masturbation fodder.

Speaking of said sexy girlfriend, which is sure to happen many times on here, I want to put it out there to those of you who I have played with in the past that she and I are available to session together. This is not an option that I've really put too much effort into offering with other playmates, but she and I have a very similar energy that we'd both feel comfortable sharing. That she is lifestyle, in addition to having experience in the professional realm, has certainly helped motivate me in this direction. That she is gorgeous and likes to laugh as much as I do, should certainly sweeten the pot for any of you who have been curious what it might be like to be the focus of someone like me times two.



As usual, if you want to play twenty questions, send me an email. If you just want to go ahead and lock down a day/time, give me a call. For the foreseeable future, this option only exists for returning clients.

And here's some of the things going on that will keep it that way for awhile.

Hitting the youth group party at the CSPC tonight because I have a play date with a luscious lady friend. At last month's party I was doing spanking tutorials as part of their pre-party tasting. She was hoping to improve the skill set of one of her new playmates so she brought him over and offered herself up as the live model for our lesson. I'm not sure if said lad has moved on, didn't have an impressive enough learning curve or she just liked my particular play style, but she's asked for a re-match. I had a lot of fun playing teacher that night but it's different when you're just getting your kinky groove on, don't have a group of folks waiting for their turn, and haven't been instructed to not abuse your power with the molesting of young nubile flesh. I didn't get any apples that night but I think I did pop a few cherries.

The educational side of things this evening has to do with artful, but fast, clothing removal for those nights when buttons are just too much to be bothered with. I hope that somewhere in the midst of this evening's fun there will be some acknowledgment of the holiday. I'm passing on staying true to my genetic heritage and spending the day/night in some boisterous bar working my way to the bottom of a whiskey bottle. However, I may be taking some lessons from my astrological mascot in this commercial:



Gil "the crab" is my new favorite-ist thing(seriously, there might need to be a logo tank-top purchase involved) and was brought to my attention by my beautiful and beloved Squirrel. The sequel to the original commercial is pretty priceless too. I fully appreciate the likes of David Mamet and Aaron Sorkin, but sometimes silly little things like this just freakin kill me.

Tomorrow I'll be attending HUMP, also at the CSPC. There's been a bit of a fuss over one of the activities at the event and I've weighed in a number of times on general principle. But it only seems fair that I show up and see for myself what some folks have been complaining about. Though my not so secret agenda is to actually help bridge the gap between those who are complaining and the folks being complained about.

The basis for this fight has to do with a subject very close to my, um, "heart", and one that I have posted about in this journal on a number of occasions. Seems that in an effort to make certain members of this event, the self-love crowd, feel more like a part of the group, a curtain was removed which separated them from the view of(and the viewing of) some of the rest of the event's participants. I'm gonna wait till after Wednesday night to do my own rant on the subject but it says a lot that even in one of this state's bastions of sex-positive culture something as, I feel, innocuous as masturbation can freak out so many people.

http://www.sexpositiveculture.org/events/zevent.2008-04-26.8974479192

To follow up on that field trip, I'll be skipping this month's Saturday costume party to conserve my energy for the also monthly full-power/judgement-free masturbation party, And I Touch Myself. I suspect there will be drama at the HUMP and I'll want to refresh myself with an event that is truly supportive* of solo as well as partnered play.

Lastly, to give some of my pals who are sure to want to check this out a little more notice, here's the flyer and info for the sure to be amazing Steampunk party on the 28th.



http://www.sexpositiveculture.org/events/zevent.2007-05-02.8059067748

*the event organizers of the HUMP have been really great during this whole debate and that comment was not meant as a jab at them but me airing my frustration with some of the attendee's close-mindedness and lack of understanding and respect.

I found out about this wonderful animated movie awhile back on Susie Bright's blog. Inspired by a recent mention of it, I did a bit of googling to see if it was out yet.

Not only has it been released but the creator, Nina Paley, has sent it out into the world with a "Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike License" and on the films website she states:

"Please distribute, copy, share, archive, and show Sita Sings the Blues. From the shared culture it came, and back into the shared culture it goes."

Here's the website where you can read all the innovative things she has to say about this method of distribution:

http://www.sitasingstheblues.com/

It truly is a bit of creative wonder. I strongly suggest you give it a watch. I viewed it at the following website, was able to get it full screen and it ran seamlessly. It's about an hour and a half long and includes an animated intermission:

http://www.thirteen.org/sites/reel13/blog/watch-sita-sings-the-blues-online/347/

If you like it pass the good word along. And if you have the means help get your local cinema/art house to show it or just send her the $10 you'd have paid to see something like this in a theater.

That's right. Time again for another one of the fabulous monthly Fem Domme Teas at the Center for Sex Positive Culture. I am excited albeit a bit apprehensive this time.

Last month's tea was much fun and included the added treat of helping a pal celebrate her birthday. Of course given the event's theme, as well as the taste of the lady in question, she was giving out her birthday spankings not receiving them. She'd already found herself a new friend in the person of a respectful older gent who'd been massaging her shoulders and back while she and I chatted. So it was only too easy to "reward" him by letting him play the part of royal whipping boy. We might have fibbed just a bit on the age of the birthday girl to help keep things interesting. I'm fairly certain she hasn't spent 65 years on this planet...at least not in this incarnation.

My effort, aside from supplying the impliments(though for the record there are always a number of nice toys provided by the event organizers) was focused on keeping our probably not-as-masochistic-as-he-was-being-treated play thing in a at least some what pleasant state with lots of head and sholder petting. Masochistic or not, he was certainly endorphin flying by the end so a good time was still had by all.

My nervousness simply has to do with attendance. The first Tea I went to, while very fun, was a bit imbalanced with the female to male ratio being roughly 2/1. But as I suspected would happen, word got out and last month's party saw a considerable swelling in numbers as well as a near perfect balance of the men to women quota. If this trend continues, I will be not at all surprised if there aren't just more folks at today's Tea but that the pendulum will continue its swing and there will be more servants then ladies to be served.

Of course I want the event to be a raging success. It is so nice to not just see this power dynamic but to see it in such all encompassing quantity. I just don't like crowds and worry that the conversations I've had with the other Dominant ladies will be harder to achieve with a physical, as well as auditory, increase in volume. I imagine that this one might be the turn of the tide on whether we need to take over the larger Center space.

Besides which I already have two sure to be wonderful conversations planned with two lovely ladies. One I have chatted with all too briefly on a couple of occasions and have yet to be able to match my schedule with for more in depth talk. The other naughty miss, I know very well, but today I get to meet one of her regular playmates. It will also be her first time attending one of the teas and I'm excited for her to see for herself what all the fuss is about. Extra bonus, do to a last minute going away party invite we'd had to move our last date from Friday to tonight. So I get to watch her go all kid in a candy store and then throughly take adavantage of her sugar high later.

Life, it is as sweet as southern tea.

The WERK Lounge that is...



Planning on attending this sexy and mellow night at the Center tomorrow. I caught the last one and really enjoyed the way they set up the space and the over-all laid back ambience of the event. There was still plenty of play going on, though unlike every other play night at the CSPC, the social is given priority over the play. But instead of being rowdier for all the conversation its was actually quieter. The attendance is less(or at least it was last time) then the Saturday Pan-sexual play parties or the Grind, the big dance night on Thursday. And that's just fine by me. I think the set up, curtaining off a number of smaller more private play areas, helps reduce the noise factor considerably.

I'm also not much interested in big, showy, performance based play so I enjoyed the intimate vibe of the scenes I saw last time. I'm more inclined to play myself....which is something I plan to do tomorrow. I've been invited to give a bit of a domme-ing tutorial to a very cute couple in their twenties.

Since I've been more active at the Center lately I've been meeting a lot of new people. I find it amusing that equal only to the amount of male "hey, hot stuff" energy directed my way has been women, young and old, interested in, well, learning from me. Specifically in how to get in touch with their Domme side.

???

I credit this to my being approachable just as much to my appearing to know what I'm doing. But I have mixed feeling about being cast in this type of role, since I feel that in the vast majority of cases, its simply a matter of affirming what others already know to be true about themselves.

For example the Tuesday after V-day my pal Hotsauce had asked me to cover spanking and paddling for the two hour tasting portion of the youth group meeting(18-35 set). Of course I was happy to help out, and honored the request by bringing a full arsenal of percussive toys, printing up some informative and funny hand-outs outlining where to hit, and only JOKING about using my position to molest hot 20 somethings while they were in vunerable positions. I had a good time, meet yet more fun folks, hopefully helped some people be better at smacking each other around and/or recognizing how much they like being spanked.

But showing someone how to DO something is different then instructing someone in how to BE something, though admittedly there is a bit of cross-over. I can show someone how to spank their partner in way that doesn't leave marks and insures they both have a good time no matter how many times the blows fall. But trying to teach a woman how to be more dominant? It's not that I ascribe to the school of thought that you either have it or you don't. I believe we all have the potential inside of us, its simply a matter of testing it out and seeing how much using that muscle feels good to you. For some its a role that may never feel natural or enjoyable, but in a controlled and consensual setting, its not something that should ever be ruled out.

And just as submissiveness in the bedroom can help folks work on being comfortable with emotional vulnerability and trust outside of it too, being dominant in the bedroom can help folks be more confident in their day-to-day. I'd certainly enjoy seeing more women be better at everything from taking a freakin compliment to standing up for themselves when they get passed over for a promotion to being willing to fight for the type of love they deserve....

So maybe I need to be better at acknowledging that I do have something to offer these women...even its just a mirror that lets them see how bad-ass they really are.

How else are we going to take over the world after all?

The PI's got the news:

http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/local/400649_porntax19.html

The ridiculous porn tax also known as Bill 2103 won't even be given a hearing. Thank goddess for the intelligent legislators who took one look at this bill and knew they'd be screwed with their pants on if they tried to pass it.

So Yeah! We win!...sort of....the folks that proposed the bill and their short sighted ideology are still in office and whose to say they won't try something similar in the future.

So trying to retain my happy mood, and help you do the same, here's another dose of sex-positive goofy goodness from those crazy kids over at the Midwest Teen Sex Show. Since I last visited they've added a number of new episodes. So check out their website to enjoy their comic take on the topics of: HPV, Boobies, Hook-ups and Vaginas. And don't forget to throw some money their way and/or buy a t-shirt while you're there.



http://midwestteensexshow.com

Okay here is the mush I didn't post yesterday. The following is a question from a new acquaintance followed by my response. I changed one detail from her email to avoid outing her. Besides which her question is one that I get fairly often from people so she shouldn't take the hit for it:

"I don't know you that well, but obviously you are a highly intelligent and reasonable woman who has done a significant amount of work as a pro dom, and I wanted to ask your opinion on, well, my opinion. :)

I'm going to summarize something I wrote in a recently: While I greatly respect sex workers, and I think that prostitution should be legal (not that you are or ever have been a prostitute), and that the stigma against sex workers and their clients is bullshit, I can understand why someone wouldn't want to pay for sex or domination. My feeling is that, yes, she may be enjoying the activities on some level, but the fact of the matter is that if she weren't being paid, she probably wouldn't be there. That's certainly not my kink.

Since I am somewhat ignorant about how the pro dom industry works, I'm wondering if you think I am missing something here. Thanks in advance."

Hey Lady,

I've got to dash here soon to get ready for the Paddles event. But I wanted to address your question.

First, if you'd have doubts about someone wanting to play with you just 'cus instead of because you are paying them...you probably shouldn't see a professional. Keep in mind though that we all pay, one way or another. Sometimes we pay by switching, or by offering mutual sexual interaction, or with love, or friendship, or commitment and all the little gifts and gestures that go along with that, or even just dinner and drinks. Most relationships, sexual or platonic, are based on a barter system. It just doesn't get as much media attention as what I do.

Secondly, as to what's going on in the mind of a sex worker(and yes I use that term to define myself even though my girly bits are never involved in my play), I can only speak for me as each one is different. But I do know a number of women in many branches of the industry that feel similar to myself.

I love what I do. I love my clients. Doing what I do allows me to access a segment of the kink community that do to their relationships, career, and/or life choices makes it impossible or impractical for them to interact with others in our community. Should they be forced to go without? Should they simply suffer in silence, stuck within the walls of the vanilla world they have built between them and a part of their sexuality? Think about the folks who finally find places like the Center for Sex Positive Culture and get to meet and know the support of others in their community. Think how meaningful that is for them.

I am able to take the place of that step for those who can't do so more publicly. I represent that community, provide them support, counsel, education, empathy and then I let them play.

I charge for my work just like the Center charges for membership, admittance and workshop fees. Those fees makes sure the doors stay open, the insurance gets paid, that a staff is organized, equipment is provided and maintained, presenters are compensated. Yes, I charge more, but though I face similar expenses, I am only one person. I am also here to cater specifically to their individual needs and schedules which can not be said of the Center or most of its members and volunteers.

Ultimately I do this because I love kink so much the idea of someone who is as kinky as me having to live their life without it makes my heart ache. I fully believe this is the work I am called to do. So yes, I am there because I want to be. Getting paid just means that I am able to be there when I am needed.

Hope this helps.

but Happy Valentines Day...




What? Were you expecting kittens in a basket?

If you don't already have plans for tomorrow I strongely suggest checking out this sure to be super sexy event:

Paddles on Parade www.paddlesonparade.org

Fundraiser Auction and Play Party for the Center for Sex Positive Culture
Saturday, February 14th, 2009
6-9p Auction, 9-3a Play Party

Auction Only $15

Basic Members and Guests $35 (Includes the Party After)

Premium Members $15 for the Auction

The Gala Auction features a live piano jazz/blues concert by Kyle Bronsdon. He plays a cabaret style mix of old favorites and original compositions. He will make you laugh, make you cry and make you swoon
for your sweetie.

Over 40 paddles available for bidding. Each hand crafted and selectively designed from members of our community and leading sex-positive supporters. Join us for a special BDSM play party afterwards*.

Featured Artists include
Patrick Fillion, Class Comics creator
Scott Paul, erotic toy maker
Lee Harrington, sex activist and educator
Joe Wheeler, master whip maker
Elsa von Schmaltz from the Von Foxies burlesque troup
Kyle Bronsdon

*Membership required for party. Non-members must get prior permission from the director (director@sexpositiveculture.org ) complete a registration form and have legal ID for entry.

I'll be there despite the fact that I usually avoid leaving my house on V-day. The cute couple-ness of it all gives me a sugar headache. Being a cronically single individual(no matter how many people I'm dating/fucking) the desperation of some folks to make Feburary 14th into the most romantic day of the year has always seemed sad and short sighted to me. Making plans for just a few days before or after instead could help insure that romantic bistro you've been wanting to check out, retains its feeling of intimacy...as opposed to feeling like I-5 at rush hour.

I had been thinking about attending this event and then one of the folks I'm seeing, who has a paddle up for auction, asked me to be his date. I assured him there would be no shame in attending this thing stag and that I could all but promise him he'd be among many who chose to do so. But what the hell, a break from my usual grinch like tradition might be fun...and he's sweetened the deal by offering to let me play with him at the party that follows the auction. Let's hope for his sake that I win one of the paddles I'm planning on bidding for. I don't often give in to my competitive nature...mostly cause I'm a real bitch when I don't win.

Guess its an extra good thing that I have a play date tonight with an extra hot heavy masochist. If I wear myself out on her tonight I might have to pull my punches tomorrow no matter what my mood is.

What ever your plans may be, and what ever your relationship status, don't forget its just one day...

and the love we have for ourselves is the most important romance of all.

*smooches*

I planned to do up a post today about the fabulous Fem Domme Tea I attended last Sunday, but alas, this bit of local political douchery has stolen my focus and burned up all my happy thoughts.

This issue was brought to my attention on SLOG yesterday and I'm fairly disturbed that it hasn't gotten more chatter since, so I felt the need to try and stir some up.

Representative Mark Miloscia has put forward a Bill(2103) that would add an 18.5% tax(and that's plus all other existing sales taxes) to "adult entertainment materials and services". He and his close-minded cronies are looking to add an amendment to existing legislation mostly related to selling and renting cars.

You can read the entire legislation here and I strongly encourage you to do so. The changes are conveniently underlined:

http://apps.leg.wa.gov/documents/billdocs/2009-10/Pdf/Bills/House%20Bills/2103.pdf

There is so much about this which is offensive I hardly know where to begin. As appealing as it is to soap box regarding how many women require battery-operated sex-related objects to get off or that it might mean the demise of beloved local institutions like Babeland, Wild at Heart and the Crypt or even that, as written, this tax could affect safe sex tools like condoms, dams and lube.

But I think my biggest issue, and what is also easiest to attack, is the argument they use to justify the tax:

"The legislature finds that the sale and use of adult entertainment materials and services result in increased costs to the state through the provision of increased governmental services, including human services and criminal justice services. It is the legislature's intention that the activities that result in these increased services bear more of the costs of these services. The legislature intends to dedicate the revenues from a tax on the sale and use of adult entertainment materials and services to crime victims' compensation, with an emphasis towards providing services, support, or therapy to those children who are victims of sexual abuse."

Its the old porn = violence argument. The tired old chestnut of sex-negative conservative thought no matter HOW MANY times it is disproved.

Please take the time to share this news with your other porn, toy and sex loving pals. And I encourage you to call or email the backers of this bill and tell them, since they clearly don't believe in butt plugs, they can shove this legislation up their ass...

feel free to use your own words, of course.

You can find the phone numbers, and direct links to email, the bill sponsors on the same site as the bill link.

And here's the original SLOG post:
http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2009/02/10/the_taxman_cometh

****UPDATE**** There's an article over at the Seattle Times that focuses almost entirely on the effect this bill would have on strip clubs and Playboy magazine with NO mention of the affect on toys and sex aides. Even with the Times bias its still pretty clear that the backers are seeing this legislation as some sort of sin tax, with a clear moral agenda to force "adult industries and products" out of our state. Lawyers with a clear first amendment case are already gearing up. Which begs the question, how many freakin times does this state have to bear the expense of a court case when they know going in they will lose.

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2008731079_porntax11m0.html